Jersey Shore, Please Take Off Your Shirt, Please Put It Back On & Brad Pitt's Breath



Okay stick with me.

Jersey Shore - a show - on MTV - I only discovered this past summer. I am late to the roadies that have gathered in a following around characters with names like "Snooki" and "The Situation" but I have to say I am loving it.

You known when summer begins and people decide to just let it all hang out after a long winter (we are talking freezing, frigid Montreal - for all of my non Montreal readers - are you there?)of being buried under 4 layers of clothing and that's not counting our coats. Yeah so there are some people I am very happy to see enjoying the sweet sultry sun topless and there are others... well not so much.

I am able to recognize that my days of wearing a bikini or a sports bra other than in my own house with the blinds closed is not a good idea. No one wants to see that - I don't even want to see it. Let's face it, we all wake up each morning and at some point see ourselves naked and at that point we make a decision

"Yes, I am still hot enough to show some skin".

"No, not a chance".

It's like being married or in a long term relationship and you're thinking of maybe breaking up but then you realize that would put you out there in the dating scene again and at some time, way too soon, you would be naked in front of someone other than the person who has talked to you with the door open while you are on the toilet and who has heard you fart so many times they can identify your fart from all others. Someone who has seen you in the morning, very morning for way too long at time. This is what saves relationships and stops us from going where no one should have to go - middle age nakedness with a stranger.

Let's get back to the title. The boys on Jersey Shore are quite adorable and all are perfectly welcome to go topless any time they like. It's a good idea.

Brad Pitt's breath - hmmm - okay so we all occasionally have bad breath - right? You know the old breath into your hands while you suffocate yourself by smothering your mouth. Well if all of us experience bad breath, no matter how delicious Brad Pitt may be, he too has bad breath from time to time and you know what? That's alright because Brady Pitt is yet another fine male specimen who can at anytime go topless and yes, it's a good idea.

I want to end this fascinating and mind boggling post with this short story that is really a paragraph.

It's okay to be a stripper in your own home behind closed doors and windows and venetian (i love saying that - do you remember when venetian blinds were the latest, greatest fad and everyone had to have them?) blinds. There is nothing wrong with a good honest, air dry and a peak in the mirror while your dog stands by and tries to smell you in all the wrong places. It's important to love yourself and the way God made you look - bare naked and real.

Just remember to put your clothes on before you leave the house. Oh and do me and Brad Pitt a favour, will ya?

Pop a mint.