People fall apart when they lose a sense of who they are or come to the realization of who they are not. Some people never delve this deep and never really change. They glide through life on a straight line - wax on - wax off.
People who lose themselves are also people who look for themselves everywhere and in everyone they meet. They look in all the right places and they lose themselves in all the wrong places.
Some of them eventually do find themselves and that allows them to settle down and walk that straight line. While others flip and flop and fly and crash and repeat the process again and again to no avail. They are tired, worn souls and although both they and their loved ones wish they could follow a straight line; they don't know how -mostly because they can't see straight.
What makes people fall apart? Well sometimes they feel alone without support, love or empathy and other times they aren’t alone rather they are surrounded by people who care for them deeply; yet still they are extremely lonely.
And although they pray night after empty night to find someone who will help them find themselves; they still go to bed alone, wake up alone and wonder what the hell happened to their lives. When did this massive bulldozer blow through town and plow their life leaving them buried in the wreckage?
At the core of it all is the child within us and the residue of our upbringings that we carry forward our entire lives. It’s the cut that never healed, the closure that never took place and the words that were never said.
We all need to find ourselves. We have our whole lives to do so and there are many hints along the way. There are people who bring us further toward the light and those who lead us through a maze of misfortune. Sometimes you aren’t able to distinguish between the two but eventually and inevitably you do and that makes the difference between being on the floor with your head in your hands or standing high with your head in the clouds.
I don’t think there is any clear and succinct definition of who we are to ourselves let alone to others. I’m not sure if it even matters. But I think at one point or another we all suffer the pain of being lost within ourselves and not knowing what to reach for next. I think we are just as capable of closing that door and staying behind it as we are of opening it and walking away.
We all fall apart. Some of us pick up the pieces and move on while others - well we just keep falling.